Things that make you SAD thread.

[Parkins left foot]

A model I've been in contact with over the past couple of weeks and I have a massive soft spot for has this evening sent me an email saying she wishes she was dead. I've known she has some mental issues and she told me her mother killed herself when she was 12 but I wasn't quite expect this. I think she's okay for today but I wish I could do more to help. I don't where she lives, nor do I have her phone number.

Clearly a difficult situation for all parties involved, especially as you only have an email contact point that is easy to ignore a response to (even if you ask for a response when it is read)

Have some experience as used to run a drug & alcohol helpline & had a few calls of this nature (where the caller had blocked their number & could have given any name). All you can do is respond giving details of facilities might help & hope that they use that info & give your own details (if you are happy to do so) and hope they will make a more personal approach so you can at least have direct contact. Ultimately you may have to accept that they will make their own decision. Its sometimes hard to take which is why all of our staff/volunteers needed counsellors available to talk to them after their shifts on the helpline.

 

[EdgeOfTheAlps]

Clearly a difficult situation for all parties involved, especially as you only have an email contact point that is easy to ignore a response to (even if you ask for a response when it is read)

Have some experience as used to run a drug & alcohol helpline & had a few calls of this nature (where the caller had blocked their number & could have given any name). All you can do is respond giving details of facilities might help & hope that they use that info & give your own details (if you are happy to do so) and hope they will make a more personal approach so you can at least have direct contact. Ultimately you may have to accept that they will make their own decision. Its sometimes hard to take which is why all of our staff/volunteers needed counsellors available to talk to them after their shifts on the helpline.

Thanks for your advice mate, I gave her my number straight away but she's told me she's alright but will call if she feels the need. Been in contact all night and I don't mind that at all. I'm scared of saying the wrong thing sooner or later.

 

[Parkins left foot]

Thanks for your advice mate, I gave her my number straight away but she's told me she's alright but will call if she feels the need. Been in contact all night and I don't mind that at all. I'm scared of saying the wrong thing sooner or later.

Good that she has a contact point with you. Hopefully if it becomes too much she will make the call.

I wouldn't worry about saying the wrong thing, the most important point is that you are there & ready to listen.

 

[EdgeOfTheAlps]

Good that she has a contact point with you. Hopefully if it becomes too much she will make the call.

I wouldn't worry about saying the wrong thing, the most important point is that you are there & ready to listen.

Yes she knows I'm there if need be and we remain in mail contact. Thanks for your advice once again, you're a star. Have a great Christmas.

 

[pavlosmacwolf]

Yes she knows I'm there if need be and we remain in mail contact. Thanks for your advice once again, you're a star. Have a great Christmas.

I'm with Parkin, you can't say the wrong thing, so if you have the patience and are prepared to get involved, then talk to her non stop, get some idea where she is, try and get her to meet, and if you have her phone number now, consider a quiet chat with the police.

Christmas is a great time of the year for many and a shit time for those of us on their own, but you must understand that you could be getting into a very deep situation and you must decide whether you want to do that.

I don't think (from my own experience) that someone who tells you they are going to end it all really wants to, they are calling for help, so try if you can to get into the reasons, and offer any solution, even if you are lying.

she clearly needs comfort, someone she can trust, and a shoulder to lean on, as long as you are happy that it's your shoulder, be prepared to give her a bit of a tough time on occassion, with a view to making her see the seriousness of her plans.

But frankly if you don't want to get in too deep, get the phone number or an address and pass it onto the police, they understand these situations at this time of the year, and know how to deal with it.

 

[EdgeOfTheAlps]

Thank you Pav. She appears more or less fine today but she seems to have these feelings every couple of days, she has some self esteem issues on top of all the crap she's been through. She's a greek lady too no less.
Enjoy your Christmas mate, and thanks

 

[Toon Wolf]

Splitting up with my partner on Christmas Day.

 

[The Bear]

Oof. That sucks.

 

[fizzwolf]

Plenty more fish

 

[The Bear]

The website or the platitude?

 

[Del Woppio]

That's shit mate. Guessing it was out of the blue?

 

[pavlosmacwolf]

Jeez Toon, that's a real bummer , see Langers for inspiration.

 

[pavlosmacwolf]

Thank you Pav. She appears more or less fine today but she seems to have these feelings every couple of days, she has some self esteem issues on top of all the crap she's been through. She's a greek lady too no less.
Enjoy your Christmas mate, and thanks

Edge, now i understand, Greek women have a tendency towards self esteem issues, Acropolis 1 is famous for turning a tiny problem into a crisis.
Personally i think it's years of putting up with the classic Greek man, basically an out and out chauvinist.
Massage her ego a lot, and spend some time doing little things/gestures for her she wouldn't expect.call her just to say hi, and she will start to come round.

My experience with Greek women, is they just love all those things that women say man never do for them.

You might find it useful to ask about her background, where she comes from, her family village, etc.
Most Greeks come from the villages and countryside, and migrated to
Athens for work.

They love you to take an interest in their village base and family traditions, and it takes their mind off all the other crap.

Just don't ask her about politics, unless you're wearing a tin hat, ha ha ha.

 

[Toon Wolf]

That's shit mate. Guessing it was out of the blue?

Not really, there's been some tension and issues that just came to a head at a really bad time I guess. I'll recover, no doubt.

 

[EdgeOfTheAlps]

Haha thanks Pav, certainly could use some of that info. Massive help.


Very sorry to hear about that Toon. Hope all works out okay for you.

 

[FrankMunro-371]

Sad news Toon. These things must be difficult at any time of the year, let alone Christmas.

 

[Toon Wolf]

Thanks for the words of support folks. Struggling to contemplate life without her at the moment, and feel as sad as I have ever felt in my life.

 

[PPB]

Spent most of today at New Cross hospital. In agony. No Wolves match for me tomorrow. Gutted and so upset.

 

[Lycan]

Gutted for you PPB. Hope you get better soon.

 

[PPB]

Gutted for you PPB. Hope you get better soon.

Thanks Lycan. Cant bloody believe it . Today of all days. Painkillers kicking in for which I am grateful .