The Laughter Cemetery

[GLASGOWOLF]

Teacher was talking to children in English
Wanted them to use the word Fascinate

Mary was first shooting her hand up miss, miss
Teacher said Mary go ahead
Mary said I went to the Zoo i saw a Gorilla it was fascinating
Teacher said good Mary but the work is Fascinate

Little Suzie said Misss Miss
Go On Suzie
I went to the shops with my Mum i was fascinated
Good Suzie but it's Fascinate

Little Johnnie shot his hand up
Miss, Miss the teacher looked and thought no fucking way
Miss, Miss, please Miss....

Teacher though and decided not even Johnnie could make that rude

My sisters cardigan has 9 buttons but her tits are so big she can only fasten 8


The following WILL Upset and Offend some snowflakes please do not read if you are offended by jokes

EDITED. WTF MAN?

 

[machin05]

Which bit of that utter bilge do you actually find funny?

 

[Johnny75]

Glasgowolf jokes, bought to you by Nigel Farage and the 1950's.

 

[Keef]

Teacher was talking to children in English
Wanted them to use the word Fascinate

Mary was first shooting her hand up miss, miss
Teacher said Mary go ahead
Mary said I went to the Zoo i saw a Gorilla it was fascinating
Teacher said good Mary but the work is Fascinate

Little Suzie said Misss Miss
Go On Suzie
I went to the shops with my Mum i was fascinated
Good Suzie but it's Fascinate

Little Johnnie shot his hand up
Miss, Miss the teacher looked and thought no $#@!ing way
Miss, Miss, please Miss....

Teacher though and decided not even Johnnie could make that rude

My sisters cardigan has 9 buttons but her tits are so big she can only

The 1970s have called asking where you are,and can you come back quickly,they're worried about you

 

[jlo]

Good of Glasgow to up the tone...[emoji849]

 

[Johnny75]

The 1970s have called asking where you are,and can you come back quickly,they're worried about you

Pfft, get your own jokes.

 

[Keef]

What? You were quicker than me due to the time difference between you in Stoke and me in Poland,and probably being a quicker typist

 

[Johnny75]

What? You were quicker than me due to the time difference between you in Stoke and me in Poland,and probably being a quicker typist

You got to Poland quickly on that bike!

 

[MARKakaJIM]

Which bit of that utter bilge do you actually find funny?

Some of his spelling is pretty comical.

 

[Penk Wolf]

My god, you lot would jump on anything.

 

[Keef]

You got to Poland quickly on that bike!

I cheated a bit and flew to Kraków,I'm now about 20 miles from Slovakia,and having a rest day,due to being unfit,and weather being 30 degrees or so

 

[Boozad]

The following WILL Upset and Offend some snowflakes please do not read if you are offended by jokes

Snowflakes? Considering I have two daughters (one of whom is getting to the age where she's going to start knocking about with boys and asking if they can come round to our house) what part should I find funny? If you can explain that I'll revoke the fact that I think you are an utter, utter contemptible fucking cunt.

 

[Boozad]

My god, you lot would jump on anything.

So you think I should just ignore that sort of shit and when my daughter rolls up with two black eyes tell her she should have listened the first two times?

 

[The Bear]

I think you're confusing a sexist joke with real life.

 

[Tony Towner]

So if I told no end of racist one liners I can remember from when I was at school which were deemed to be fair game at the time would that be acceptable now because it's only a joke? If I preface them with a sneering comment would it give me the moral high ground?

 

[The Bear]

Well they'd be outdated, embarrassing and just not funny. That doesn't mean I'd make the assumption that you were as racist as the jokes though. Just that you had shit taste in jokes.

 

[PuntsWolf]

Regardless of how true to life they are

1) they aren’t funny
2)not sure how you’d find them funny in 2018
3) why would you think it would be fun to share it on a forum.

I’m as far from PC as it gets but I can’t understand the thought process of that.

 

[YoungWolf]

My god, you lot would jump on anything.

Seriously?

 

[Tony Towner]

Well they'd be outdated, embarrassing and just not funny. That doesn't mean I'd make the assumption that you were as racist as the jokes though. Just that you had $#@! taste in jokes.

I think the snowflake comment annoyed me more than the 'jokes'. Personally I think he's a stain on this site and have Pm'd a mod previously to say so.

 

[Boozad]

I think you're confusing a sexist joke with real life.

I couldn't give a fuck what you think.