On a slightly more serious note, just reading about all your delays, is this the same problem I'm having with these 'postal hubs'?
I bought 3 books from various locations in the UK, one came direct (6 days) one came via Guernsey and Frankfurt (16 days) and the 3rd one came via Frankfurt and Malmo to Dublin (23 days) then here. A set of hinges from Alfreton went around Europe. When I chased it up, the company had no Idea that these were going into Postal hubs.
I just don't get this postal hub nonsense.
I ordered a product from Abergele on 18th November, due December 15th. I rang the company and they dispatched it the day after I ordered it, after that Royal Mail are just fucking about with it.... When I rang to tell her she was appalled! She had no idea either.