The Kids Thread

[AndyWolves]

Spent almost three months rearranging the whole house & decorating to free up my study for a bedroom so the twins can have their own bedroom each. Finished decorating, bought new furniture, even got an extra computer so they can have one each.

Today is first day that it's all done and they have decided they want to sleep in the same room tonight. FML.

How old are your twins if you don't mind me asking?

 

[Tredman]

How old are your twins if you don't mind me asking?

10! That’s old enough, next few years are going to be less fun I imagine.

 

[t3ch]

context, we have a 15 year old

gf came stomping into my office after having started dinner

WHERE IS THE MAYONNAISE?
uhm, in the fridge?
IT'S NOT THERE.
well I haven't used i recently, sorry.
THAT IS THE 3RD JAR THAT'S DISAPPEARED THIS MONTH. THE LAST ONE I BOUGHT SHOULD'VE LASTED MONTHS. WHERE IS IT GOING??!?!
that's weird... sorry I don't know.
IS [the kid] EATING IT ALL? IS HE DOING WEIRD STUFF WITH IT???
[holding back laughter] pffft.... honey I don't know, I don't know what to tell you.

so she's on a rampage about this goddamn mayo. goes over to his room, "WHERE'S THE MAYONNAISE?!", to which he just kinda goes durr hurr uhh I don't know what are you talking about.

meanwhile I am absolutely in tears in my office.

things settle down then I guess he came and said something, I don't know, all I heard was "ARE YOU WHACKIN WITH IT?!?!" from the other room and I was in utter hysterics. I gave myself a horrible headache from laughing so hard but it was worth it.

 

[Tredman]

context, we have a 15 year old

gf came stomping into my office after having started dinner

WHERE IS THE MAYONNAISE?
uhm, in the fridge?
IT'S NOT THERE.
well I haven't used i recently, sorry.
THAT IS THE 3RD JAR THAT'S DISAPPEARED THIS MONTH. THE LAST ONE I BOUGHT SHOULD'VE LASTED MONTHS. WHERE IS IT GOING??!?!
that's weird... sorry I don't know.
IS [the kid] EATING IT ALL? IS HE DOING WEIRD STUFF WITH IT???
[holding back laughter] pffft.... honey I don't know, I don't know what to tell you.

so she's on a rampage about this goddamn mayo. goes over to his room, "WHERE'S THE MAYONNAISE?!", to which he just kinda goes durr hurr uhh I don't know what are you talking about.

meanwhile I am absolutely in tears in my office.

things settle down then I guess he came and said something, I don't know, all I heard was "ARE YOU WHACKIN WITH IT?!?!" from the other room and I was in utter hysterics. I gave myself a horrible headache from laughing so hard but it was worth it.

Shouldn’t laugh, partly because of the situation but also mayonnaise is quite disturbing as a lubricant.

 

[The Bear]

Yeah, salad cream is better...

 

[Pablowolf]

Crunchy peanut butter if you're a bit kinky.

 

[AndyWolves]

Walking round the house this evening singing the Follow, Follow, Follow song. One of my 2 1/2 year old twins is now singing "drinking their lager" thankfully my wife can't quite make out what she's actually singing

 

[Tredman]

WTF has happened to Thomas the Tank Engine? He’s in the jungle in the latest series going round bends on two wheels.

Wrong in every way.

 

[MARKakaJIM]

Has he dropped an axle?

 

[Tredman]

He’s dropped a bomb.

 

[Tyrannosaurus Dan]

If anyone see this escalator out of action in the Bull Ring, they can thank my son for it. That is his shoe stuck in it halfway up... [emoji2357]

 

[Tredman]

Just had to explain to one of our 10 year olds that if a girl texts you to ask to be your girlfriend it’s not polite to just reply ‘No’ [emoji849]

 

[WarwickWolf]

Just had to explain to one of our 10 year olds that if a girl texts you to ask to be your girlfriend it’s not polite to just reply ‘No’ [emoji849]

A friend of mine's teenage son had a similar request at secondary school. He agreed but then didn't talk to her for a month.

 

[SLA]

Just had to explain to one of our 10 year olds that if a girl texts you to ask to be your girlfriend it’s not polite to just reply ‘No’ [emoji849]

I wish someone had told Mary Vittori that back in 1983. #stillhurts

 

[Tyrannosaurus Dan]

One of the few positives to come out of this situation is all the extra family time I will get now I'm off work for a few weeks.

We've done family disco's, craft sessions and watched magic shows via Facebook and YouTube and I am about to do PE with Joe dressed as the Cookie Monster.

 

[machin05]

One of the few positives to come out of this situation is all the extra family time I will get now I'm off work for a few weeks.

We've done family disco's, craft sessions and watched magic shows via Facebook and YouTube and I am about to do PE with Joe dressed as the Cookie Monster.

Joe's session was tough this morning!

 

[Tyrannosaurus Dan]

It was. I've only been doing it for 3 days so the rest of the family have a head start on me too.

 

[Langers]

Joe's session was tough this morning!

Fnarr...

 

[Tyrannosaurus Dan]

If anybody is doing some home schooling, the BBC Bitesize website has daily lessons on and they are pretty good. Our kids are really enjoying them.

 

[Tyrannosaurus Dan]

Anybody else got kids obsessed with Pokemon? It is pretty much all my 6 year old thinks and talks about these days!

He’s collected a ton of cards over the last year or so and my wife and I have spent this weekend sorting all his binders out into individual sets and putting them in number order. It was a right pain in the arse to do but very satisfying now we’ve finished!

We’ve just got to start to fill some of the gaps in his collections now. I suspect Santa will be dropping off a big bundle of cards this year that he conveniently doesn’t already have.