The Mental Health thread

[Deutsch Wolf]

Mate, I feel like a fucking fraud all the time. I can't fucking write, I just write as if I'm talking to you, face to face. That's no talent, is it? I'm not putting any effort in, I'm just typing as if you and I were sat in the pub. Translation? Oh, big fucking deal. I'd like to think if you've studied a language for 20+ years then you'd be able to put it into your native tongue. That's kind of what you do. Proofreading? It's being one of those annoying pricks who correct grammar. Nice one.

I don't feel like I have any kind of ability whatsoever. Now plenty of people tell me that's rubbish and so I have to listen to them, but I don't think I can do owt. Or at least, that's what I think now. I'm trying to change that but it takes time.

 

[Alan]

I think being able to write without feeling like you're making an effort is probably indicative of natural talent.

 

[Dublin Drummer Wolf]

Mate, I feel like a fucking fraud all the time. I can't fucking write, I just write as if I'm talking to you, face to face. That's no talent, is it? I'm not putting any effort in, I'm just typing as if you and I were sat in the pub. Translation? Oh, big fucking deal. I'd like to think if you've studied a language for 20+ years then you'd be able to put it into your native tongue. That's kind of what you do. Proofreading? It's being one of those annoying pricks who correct grammar. Nice one.

I don't feel like I have any kind of ability whatsoever. Now plenty of people tell me that's rubbish and so I have to listen to them, but I don't think I can do owt. Or at least, that's what I think now. I'm trying to change that but it takes time.

Self doubt comes in all shapes and sizes. I don't really get depressed, I am generally happy go lucky. But when it comes to work, I literally cannot talk sometimes. My girlfriend and I work in the same business park and we walk in together in the morning, and she can always tell when I'm stressed as I stop talking. And it's always work related. When I'm out of work I'm fine. Maybe I need a different job? But the thing is...... I really like my job.

Dan, writing is your forte. The success of the blog reinforces that. Focus on the positives, you've had a great year on the blog. The only people planting doubt in our heads is ourselves.

 

[Deutsch Wolf]

I think being able to write without feeling like you're making an effort is probably indicative of natural talent.

Dan, writing is your forte. The success of the blog reinforces that. Focus on the positives, you've had a great year on the blog. The only people planting doubt in our heads is ourselves.

Yeah, I know this. Even though my mind tells me I'm rubbish, I know that the reaction I've got means I must be ok on some level at least. Hey, I've even spoken on the radio and held up kind of ok there. Doesn't stop it though.

I don't know how I fix the issue, I'm a tiny bit better than I was a year ago in terms of confidence but at that rate of progress I'd be ok by about 2072. I'll keep trying and we'll see how we go.

 

[Keef]

I'm with Alan on that,making it look easy is a sign of talent,I definitely haven't got it,as the drivel I post on here shows(I've 1 half decent post in 800 odd,so I let everyone know in my signature) it's a similar thing with radio broadcasting,the best presenters make it sound effortless and though they're just talking to you.
I enjoy the articles you write,always insightful,interesting and I love the obscure britpop one hit/no hit wonder references,and how you're always descriptive of the Welsh buffoon,when I'd just call him a cunt tbh.

 

[AndyWolves]

I think because we as individuals find certain things come easy or naturally (because you've invested time and effort into said thing) that we think other people can do the same and it feels arrogant or narccistic to think any differently. Therefore we don't value our skills / uniqueness.



When I'm put into a new position or job I feel like I'm hopeless at it for the first two years, I'll then have an epiphany and realise I've actually become ok at it and then get offered a new role or position. It happens every time. I'm in the middle of the two years of "being shit" cycle and I'm on a really big project (biggest we've ever had) plus I've got twins under 1 year old.

It sometimes feels like there's no escape for me to just think and relax. I'm someone who needs alone time just to recharge, tonight I had a few hours on the Xbox for the first time in ages and feel much better for it

 

[The Bear]

Writing as though you're talking to the reader one on one is part of the reason your blog has done well. It's easy to fall into the trap of putting down dull, stiff sentences and being overly factual, so you definitely need to give yourself credit there Dan.

 

[Trips]

Mate, I feel like a fucking fraud all the time. I can't fucking write, I just write as if I'm talking to you, face to face. That's no talent, is it? I'm not putting any effort in, I'm just typing as if you and I were sat in the pub. Translation? Oh, big fucking deal. I'd like to think if you've studied a language for 20+ years then you'd be able to put it into your native tongue. That's kind of what you do. Proofreading? It's being one of those annoying pricks who correct grammar. Nice one.

I don't feel like I have any kind of ability whatsoever. Now plenty of people tell me that's rubbish and so I have to listen to them, but I don't think I can do owt. Or at least, that's what I think now. I'm trying to change that but it takes time.

The reason I enjoy reading your work is because it's written as though you are talking to us all one-to-one. Newspaper and online reports of games are written exactly as they are, reports. Your reviews actually critique performances, good or bad, and are very insightful. Not everyone will agree with them but that's the same with any subject. If I wanted a factual representation of a game (meaning all I get is x player scored and then y player equalised) I can find that anywhere. Articles where it feels like someone is talking about something, rather than reporting is so much better IMO.

Hopefully see more work from you soon, you're too talented a writer to not put stuff out there

 

[Trips]

On a personal note had a really tough evening so far, following the issues of last night. Anxiety hasn't really been an issue for me the last few years, but have spent most of the evening on edge that I could another night like last night. I have probably had only 4-5 hours sleep since I got up Wednesday morning, yet I don't feel I can go to bed, and need to stay awake to make sure the family are OK. I am literally just sat in my lounge listening for any suspacious sounds or movements outside

 

[Deutsch Wolf]

"Happy pills" :icon_lol:

Yeah, I'm living a Mardi Gras, me. 24 hours a day, every day.

The stupidity of the Heil knows no bounds.

 

[jd1981]

Another great headline from the Mail, I’m on Sertraline and have been for the last 2 months. Telling you now I don’t get up every morning dancing down the stairs.
As DW says it just stops my anxiety spiralling out of control, January is nearby which I always find a tough time of year.

 

[Derby Wolf]

So the increase in anti depressant prescriptions correlates with the decreasing stigma surrounding mental health conditions over the last 15 years?

Well stone me.

 

[jd1981]

This is it people are more willing to speak to the GP about their problems compared to 20 years ago. I was having a really bad time of things in the RAF about 16 years ago and there was no way I was going to speak to the doctors on base about it.
If I’d taken time out back then due to MH problems I’d have been seen as quote the phrases”letting the side down” “odd ball” etc Attitude back then was very much one of go and have a few beers with your mates and pull yourself together it can’t be that bad.

 

[tricky wolf]

wow about 7 yrs ago wifes mom was dieing i had a stressful job ........... it took its toll on me big time as time went by things got better till the 11/12/17
i was then told my wife has bowel canser which has spread to liver and lungs ! i feel fkin useless and stressed to fk but cant show it !

 

[Bit on the shaggies]

wow about 7 yrs ago wifes mom was dieing i had a stressful job ........... it took its toll on me big time as time went by things got better till the 11/12/17
i was then told my wife has bowel canser which has spread to liver and lungs ! i feel fkin useless and stressed to fk but cant show it !

My honest advice would be to find someone to talk to. It doesn't really matter who they are, you just need their trust. I tried talking to my GP, to a shrink, to friends and family, but I couldn't open up and say what I needed to say. Everybody wanted to talk about my wife, but I needed to talk about me. It ended up being my boss, a man I owe very, very much.

You will undoubtedly be there for her, don't be afraid to ask someone to be there for you. I wouldn't know who to look for in Britain, check online for cancer support.

My thoughts are with you and your wife.

 

[tricky wolf]

well my boss is a joke when i told him what was going on his reply was . i don't care what ur life is like ! and all hr say is do what you have to ffs .

 

[lemonjelly]

https://www.theguardian.com/society/2018/jan/07/is-everything-you-think-you-know-about-depression-wrong-johann-hari-lost-connections

 

[AndyWolves]

After months and months of pretending everything is fine I think I had a bit of a breakdown over the weekend. I'm majorly stressed about a project at work

I ended up blurting everything out to my wife who listened but she couldn't really assuage my fears. So I've contacted healthy minds and will be looking to set something up.

On my commute this morning I was listening to Flintoff describe depression and I ticked off everything he said and realised it isnt just now I get these thoughts / feelings. Like feeling that you don't really belong anywhere, never being as happy as I should be when things are going well, thinking one minor setback is the end of the world. These feelings have been there my entire life but I just put it down to me being weak and needing to man up. I've copied up until now but I think I need to do something about it now

 

[lemonjelly]

Good luck mate. You're doing exactly the right thing. Talking, accessing support, trying to understand.

 

[Trips]

Echo LJ's words. You're doing the right things. Speaking about things with your wife will help also. I kept a lot of things hidden from mine when I was at my worst, but now I open up to her as much as I can. She doesn't fully understand exactly how I feel, but is always there to listen which is a great help.