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Edinburgh Fringe - Best Joke Award

These are always wildly unrepresentative, both of the festival and (usually) of the acts themselves.

There's much more to the Fringe than these shit one-liners.
 
Do people pay to watch this crap?
 
Kenny said:
The pun jokes at Edinburgh are normally dominated by Tim Vine and Milton Jones.

Tim Vine has had some brilliant ones that didn't win over the years
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I have a huge dislike for Vine. Not entirely sure why but he is such a wanker.
 
Tredman said:
I have a huge dislike for Vine. Not entirely sure why but he is such a wanker.
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Saw him on some rubbish celebrity thing a while ago with another celeb and presenter, and unlike the other guy kept looking and talking to the camera instead of the presenter. It just looked really odd, disrespectful to the presenter and all a bit desperate.

Not really seen any of his other work but on the basis of that one-off yeah, did come across as a wanker.
 
That time of year again. Here are 2024's top 15. I liked 6 and 10 personally, both from Olal Falafel which is a great name!


1. I was going to sail around the globe in the world’s smallest ship but I bottled it. - Mark Simmons

2. I've been taking salsa lessons for months, but I just don't feel like I'm progressing. It's just one step forward... two steps back. - Alec Snook

3. Ate horse at a restaurant once - wasn’t great. Starter was all right but the mane was dreadful. - Alex Kitson

4. I sailed through my driving test. That’s why I failed it. - Arthur Smith

5. I love the Olympics. My friend and I invented a new type of relay baton: well, he came up with the idea, I ran with it.- Mark Simmons

6. My dad used to say to me “Pints, gallons, litres” – which, I think, speaks volumes - Olaf Falafel

7. British etiquette is confusing. Why is it highbrow to look at boobs in an art gallery but lowbrow when I get them out in Spoons? - Chelsea Birkby

8. I wanted to know which came first the chicken or the egg so I bought a chicken and then I bought an egg and I think I've cracked it. - Masai Graham

9. My partner told me that she’d never seen the film Gaslight. I told her that she definitely had - Zoë Coombs Marr

10. The conspiracy theory about the moon being made of cheese was started by the hallouminati. - Olaf Falafel

11. I’m an extremely emotionally needy non-binary person: my pronouns are ‘there there’. - Sarah Keyworth

12. I've got a girlfriend who never stops whining. I wish I'd never bought her that vineyard - Roger Swift

13. Gay people are very bad at maths. We don't naturally multiply. - Lou Wall

14. Keir Starmer looks like an AI-generated image of a substitute teacher - Sophie Duker

15. Growing up rich is a hereditary condition. It affects 1% of people - Olga Koch
 
11 for me, although it only works verbally
 
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10 is my favourite but the winner is very good too.
 
4 is okay. 11 is good. 6 and 10 are both fine efforts. And for once the winner isn't awful.
 
Not any totally terrible ones there. I quite like number 5. 10 is good.
 
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